Three days ago, while having lunch with brother and his wife in his suburban New York home, I got up after finishing with my lunch, picked up my plate and made to go drop it off in the kitchen. His wife said,

“No Jamie, that’s not correct, I’ll take it.” I told her I was running a project on Sexual and Gender-Based Violence and abuse, and such attitude, of assuming the woman must clear up after the man is tantamount to sgbv. My brother kept quiet. He obviously did not like the idea of me coming to his suburban New York home from Africa to mess around with my projected ideas of maledom. I took the plate to the kitchen and went to the living room to watch tv – happy with myself.

This afternoon when I was leaving for Gabs, I stood with brother and watched as my luggage were being put in the conveyor by the airport handlers at JFK International Airport – my hand luggage, meanwhile, was with my sister-in-law, or rather standing beside my sister-in-law. When we were done watching the luggage go into the chute, we moved to where my sister-in-law and my sister were waiting. As we moved off, I noticed my hand luggage was left behind by my sister-in-law and my sister (she too must have been told of my project). I walked back and picked it up and remarked, “I see I’m being a victim of my gender-positive ways.”

My brother did not say anything, he just smiled.

Copyright © Fani-Kayode Omoregie 2012