the first chisel into your well-guarded love forte is usually “are you happy, i mean are you ok?” this question either in two parts or in either part format unravels your world like a bitch. you see, what you don’t realize most times is, everything you are – for better or worse – is related to who you are in relationship with at the moment. so any response in the negative – even if you are talking about dissatisfaction at work (may) eventually end with the question “how’s he/she taking it though?” let’s suppose it does. depending on the the nature of your mind, this question might lead to your love forte being jail-broken. you might answer “he/she is ok. he/she has really been supportive.” but then you go home and start to watch out for signs that suggest otherwise. believe me, you will find many. a plain piece of paper hanging from a pocket becomes a love note. you take longer to fetch anything from your lover’s bag because while your hand is on what you are looking for, your eyes are looking for what shouldn’t be in the bag. you start wishing you have dog-hearing when phone calls come in. you start to call instead of just texting when you are apart. suddenly “i hope you’re warm and have eaten?” followed by “just checking on my boo because i was missing you. love you” (click). becomes “i hope you’re warm and have eaten?” (Listening for background movements and voices) “just checking on my boo because i was missing you. do you miss me?” (silence) “i asked you a question” (you hear your lover move. whispering) “babe, what sort of question is that. you know i do.” (listening for background interference) “then say it” (whispering) “babe, i am in a meeting. i took this call because i thought it was an emergency because you know about the meeting. ok. I miss you” (silence) “oh, sorry. i totally forgot about the meeting”. i don’t know how this situation happened with you but the point is you are trying to make your lover say something that might prove to who he/she might be with that there’s someone special in his/her life. your human mind is now in siege-mode. your mind doesn’t register the fact that he/she said “babe” every time he/she spoke. did you just go back to reread that? the human mind! now, please note i didn’t say the person who asked you the question “are you ok?” had ulterior motives. it may have genuinely been a question of concern because you didn’t look yourself. but you put a meaning into “how’s he/she taking it?” you put “does he/she still love me?” into that question. the point is, whereas everything you are is a direct consequence of who you are in a relationship with, everything you are is not a consequence of the love you share. so, the love you share shouldn’t become a victim of the consequence of everything you are. simply put, no one jail-breaks your love forte but you and your human mind. they say “love is not for the faint-hearted – love is not for the flimsy-minded. (To be continued)

F-K 2016