dear bugalo,

cld i? shld i? wld i? wats up wit u man? as much as u dnt want 2 admit it i knw that u r sked of me, if u wrnt u wldnt be acting the way u r. do u ever think of standing outside yrslf nd looking at the things that u do? bcoz i do n it helps a lot. am convinced that u r sked of me if u r not then prove me rong. the reason y am saying this is bcoz u dnt wana be alone wit me i mean not in the privacy of ur offix bcoz there is none, as workers r always at ur door. do u knw whn u r talking 2 me u cant even look at me? r u afraid of wat i might see? am playful yes but that is nth 2 hide behind. i am a rare breed and u can never find anyone like me anywhere. u dont want to talk abt wats bothering u, 2 me it dsnt make any sense. am not perfect, that much i know, what i dnt know is wat is ur problem? u havnt been communicating wit me for some time n whn u finally decide that u want to talk u call me and tell me to meet u at ur own time? well guess what, this world isnt abt wat u want only. am sorry, but u need to realise that as much as u wish me to disappear, it aint gona happen until u tell me wats troubling you, it might not be 2day or 2mrw but i aint gona rest until u tell me or get a restraining order. i need peace of mind n so do u, i can never get that until u tell me to my face to back off if at all thats wat u want. am a pain, i knw n i cant change who or what i am because u cant face up 2 the challenge. like i told u, am not all uptight about life n if u cant accept me the way i am, thn there is no way i can change 2 meet ur demands, there is no way i can change to be wat u want me 2 be, bcoz wat u see is wat u get, babe. u need 2 open up a bit so i can have easy access to ur emotions. in ths way i will be able 2 know wat u like, want, need n wat u dont. now its like i dont even knw u at all, 2day u r all smiles, funny, down to earth, and the next u all so uptight, chicky n bitter; wats up with the 2 conflicting identities? u r confusing me n i dont knw wat is wat. atleast u have been able 2 easly find out the kind of person i’m – am not a coward, am the kind of prson who glares back at the bullying, brutality n realities of life wit courage n honour. i’v got that king of va-va-voom! am not a shrinking violet nor am i the kind of gal who ignores prblms, i face them full-on. whn inevitable prblms come my way i face them, i dont let anything put me dwn. so y dont u be like me huh!?! i believe that u r a grwn up n so r in a good position to face up evrth that comes ur way with responsibility. but if a small thing like me has the power to make u sked n act like a child, dsnt that indicate smth abt ur size? i dont knw wat ur mission is but my mission in life is to experience more, i want to see more, do more, feel more, taste more n touch more! n if u r in no position to accept me the way i am thn u r not the kind of man i thot u were. am sorry, i honestly, trully, sincerely miss the bugalo i met in january wat did u do 2 him?